Perspective from a heart.

I was married in a big fat Greek wedding.  As in the eponymous movie I was not a Greek groom.  My wife's immigrant and first generation American family was large and close knit.  Lots of cousins, theas (aunts) and theos, but, oddly, no pets.  Most owned or worked in restaurants or were lawyers,  teachers or business owners. Really a great, fun loving but hard working group.

Now the Greek Orthodox marriage ceremony calls for "koumbara" or spiritual sponsors. They are usually close friends or relatives of the bride and groom and they have a part in the ceremony.   Our koumbara were a first cousin and his wife.  They are a joyous couple, bubbly, outgoing and very fun to be around. 

We have been married for nearly fifteen years now.  Our koumbara baptized my first born and she is blessed with these finest of Godparents.  Recently though some clouds have darkened the horizon.  The husband in that sponsor couple was recently stricken by a viral infection of unknown origin and fearsome effect.  It caused him multiple short hospital stays  and several weeks off work.  It has been an intense and clear reminder that circumstances can change in a heartbeat.  Between hospital stays, he recently made his way out to a hot air balloon festival where we chatted.  It was good to see him not in hospital bed.  He was looking much better.

A couple days later I was feeling very pressured.  I was hating the practice of law and feeling the tension caused by several unresolved cases.  If asked to describe my state of mind in one word, I'd have said depressed.  I called a friend from law school who practices nearby.  I wanted him to talk me off the ledge of chucking it all.  Turned out he was feeling the same as I!  Some help.  We laughed and commiserated for a full hour, half that time was while I was with my wife during a lunch break at Subway. She was eating, Facebooking and listening approvingly while I took some friend therapy.

My afternoon improved steadily with my mood.  By dinner time all seemed well. Then I got the news that my beloved koumbaro was back in the hospital with a nagging fever.  I wished I could talk him better, but that kind of therapy isn't what he needed.  My little meltdown, settled with the words of a kind friend, seemed frivolous in this perspective.

Health is precious and irritatingly fragile.  Did you know the flu killed millions of Americans in an epidemic in the early 1900s?  Millions!  The flu!  You just don't know.  Friendships are also tenuous over time and distance.  The good news is that they can last and grow forever with just a little care and feeding.  Sadly though, they can disappear with inattention.  Best to spend a moment or two, now and then, keeping real friendships, not virtual friendships, but real, "hey let's get a cup  of coffee" friendships, alive and well.

We need our friends and we need our health.  They are intertwined.  I am grateful for the reminders and the lessons, and praying for the health of my koumba.  Get well soon. (P.S. Since I first wrote this piece, my koumbaro is out of the hospital and improving nicely.)